Are my extreme mood swings due to bipolar personality disorder?

Hello doctor,

I have an abusive and narcissistic father, who has also made sexual advances towards me many times. I have never been understood by my family nor had minimum space for myself. I feel anxious when left alone. I could not get on with relationships due to strict family boundaries imposed by my father, whom I idealized in childhood. I have had a history of the following conditions:

• Addiction behavior leading to impulsive and depressive cycles.
• Impulsive emotionality leading to oversharing of personal information and searching for emotional space from others or strangers.
• Bragging about love and friendship leading to an inferiority complex with abandonment and rejected feelings.
• Showcasing by breaching privacy leading to guilt feeling and loss of self-confidence and self-respect.
• Frustrating Cycles of thought leading to depression due to repetitive cycles of wrong actions.
• Dependency on others for emotional stability leading to a lack of self-control over emotions and needy behavior towards others.
• Anger and despair over things beyond self-control leading to complaining and abusive behavior and a general sense of sadness regarding life.
• No deep connection with oneself with a sense of confusion leading to agreeable behavior and unworthy feeling about oneself.
• Nothing to nurture the creative mind leading to a boring life with nothing to cherish and accomplish at a mental level giving space for speculation and worrying.
• Needing a partner to live a life of fulfillment and happiness leading to never being happy with oneself with a deep sense of loss of fulfillment and happiness without a partner and constant searching for a partner in anyone and anywhere giving rise to frustration.

Previously, I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder with stress ten years ago, and with major depressive disorder with anxiety one year ago. I have taken some counseling sessions four years back. It felt good during the sessions; however, I had a similar problem after I stopped going to counseling due to a change of place. Currently, I am not using any medications or going for counseling sessions.

I was given tablet Oliment 5 and tablet Enchorate Chrono MD 200 mg for bipolar disorder, however, these medicines would numb my brain activity, leading to a feeling of no urgency even in urgent situations, and make me feel lethargic, so I have stopped using them nine years back during my examinations. Also, I had a lot of weight gain and hair loss due to the medicines.

I am looking forward to psychological counseling with no pharmacological interventions.

Kindly help.