How to manage anorexia?

Hi doctor,

I am a 16-year-old and recovering from anorexia. I was diagnosed with anorexia and hospitalized for a week about a year ago. I do not have any doctors nutritionists or counselors right now. I can eat three meals a day now, but the thing is I kind of feel like I binge eat. I usually do not have any snacks during the day because I do not want to feel nauseous and full during the day. But at dinner time, I think I unconsciously eat too much. But the frustrating thing is that my brain still tells me I want to eat dessert. Most of the time I cannot resist it and I eat dessert which is like just a yogurt bowl with granola but I still feel full and nauseous afterwards. I tell myself I will eat some snacks or light meals before dinner to help myself not to unconsciously eat so much. I did try to eat some food before but I felt more hungry after eating a bit before dinner. But I feel like I ate more mindfully at dinner when I ate something small before.

I still struggle with many things from my anorexia such as trying to eat less and serving others meals so much more than mine. My doctors back in the hospital gave me three meals and three snacks a day at three-hour intervals but when it comes to real life it is so hard, especially on weekends. I hate eating without proper schedule and timing but my family does it every weekend. I do not know what to do.

It would help me so much if you could give me some advice or suggestions.

Thank you.